He's So Lucky

I'm a dreamer. I dream, I daydream, I fantasize, I converse in my head. The wheels in my head are usually spinning out of control. Some people say it's an over-active imagination, others simply call it procrastination, & yet there are those who sum it up to adult ADD - probably. I'm the kid in the movies who sits and stares out the window dreaming about how I'm the nerdy girl & no one likes me. They all make fun of me & trip me in the halls & shove me into my locker until the cutest boy in school asks me out because he sees that spark of beauty deep down inside of me. And I tell him, 'No way!', because I've got a great personality, I totally know who I am. I'm one of those spicy, sarcastic type of girls who's great at bantering & so that makes the cute boy want me all the more & everyone else is like, 'What does he see in her?'....... And then the cranky he-teacher snaps me out of my daydream and totally embarrasses me. So then, I start daydreaming about how I'll get my revenge on him & everyone else in the class who was laughing.......

Anyways, my mind doesn't seem to slow down much when I'm unconscious either. It's very rare for me to have a dreamless night. And, about once a year or so, I'll have these blockbuster dreams that are like epoch trilogies. Sometimes, they'll go on for 2 or 3 nights in a row (not recurring, the to-be-continued kind). I'll get so wrapped up in them that I can't wait to go to sleep the next night to find out what happens next and then when I do, I'll have a completely different dream. It's like someone turned the channel. I'm sorry but, The Love Boat just won't do when you've been anticipating Lost all day. Ugh. I never find out what happens. I mean, come on! Did I ever get away from the bad vampires after I escaped their English dungeon (can you guess what I've been reading lately?) & save the little children in the daycare who were right in their path leading to me? Did I ever get to the attic in my grandma's house in Portland, the last safe place on earth for me to be, in time? Who knows, because I wake up and can't ever get my unconscious brain back to the right channel.

I also have lots, & I mean a lot (for the most part this is about the only adult interaction I get during the day) of conversations, with people, in my head. I mostly talk to Manly in my head, but sometimes if I have a conflict with someone, like a jerky painter, then I'll go over that conversation in my head before he arrives. I imagine what he'll say, then what I'll say to that, and then what he'll say back (trying to be all cool) & then I'll totally burn him with a great one-liner. Of course, when he actually does show up I don't say any of it out loud and he's the one getting in all of the punches with the rude things he says. And I just take it - whatever.

But, I can totally predict how these conversations are going to go in my head. In the past when I have tried to have these conversations with Manly.....out loud......in real life, I usually ended up getting mad because he didn't follow the script and he would start saying the wrong things. I felt like stomping my foot & yelling, 'That's not how it's supposed to go! Try again!' And maybe that happened once or twice.....I can't remember. So for the sake of the family, our marriage, his sanity and the peace in our home (ahem) I've learned to keep those kind of conversations in my head. Until now.

I recently had a very, um, descriptive talk with Manly, in my head, in which he was telling me why he's the luckiest man in the world to be married to me. Sweet, huh? So of course I'm going to share, but really there's not enough time to tell you everything he said. Honestly, I don't want to brag. Some people are really full of themselves & I'm totally not like that. So here's Manly's (the Manly that was talking in my head) top 5 reasons why he's so lucky.

1. I sacrifice. I make a lot of sacrifices for him and his children (yes, I did incubate & bear them, but I like to give him all the credit for them. I'm generous that way.). For example, making dinner for them when I could be doing something else like reading a book or watching one of my chick-flicks. Or not spending a lot of $ on home decor & shoes when there is really so much that I want. I love how in my head he gets that. He so understands how many things there are out there that I want to buy & don't & what a toll it takes on me.

2. I'm a giver. I'm constantly giving him free advice - he doesn't even have to ask for it. I give him advice on everything like how to style his hair, what clothes to wear & even how to rub my feet more effectively. There is never a shortage on the advice I give him. He can't get enough.

3. I never complain. About 6 months ago our dishwasher wasn't working. I didn't complain once when I had to ask him & his children to wash the dishes after dinner. He really appreciated that. No man wants a complaining, nagging wife. He is lucky.

4. I'm thoughtful. I'm frequently thinking of ways he can be a better husband (everyone can use some help sometimes. Well, most everyone, some of us don't need it.) & ways he can make my life easier. And, I'm always thinking up those cute little compliments he should be giving me. He loves that.

5. I'm pretty much perfect. In my head he told me how perfect I really am, but that seemed a little sacrilegious to me. I'm not that perfect - no one is - but I'm probably pretty close. He really does make a good argument for it. Like he said: I'm an excellent cook, I'm an awesome housekeeper, manager, organizer & decorator - watch out Martha, I'm on your heals. I still look good for my age - aka, hot momma. I sing, I dance, I'm way funny. Not to mention, I'm smart, witty & especially humble (the list could go on & on, but you get the point.)

Are you totally going, 'Oooooh! How sweet. She's so lucky!'? I am. I am so lucky that I'm a dreamer because that conversation, in my head, totally made my day. Does anyone ever say nice things to you in your head? Or do you have the best one-liners when no one else is listening? Let me know, I'd love to hear about your dreams & sweet escapes.