Tuesday, November 11, 2008

Sad face


(Our dog, Rocket. This is what he had to say when I told him what my friend Mary said about dogs in China.)

Have you ever made a big, HUGE mistake, which no matter how hard you try to remember the magic spells you learned from Harry Potter, you can't make disappear? It will never go away. A mistake, which your small, malnourished, stupid brain made your big, fat, stupid mouth say & hurt the feelings of those you love?

I have.

It sucks. (I'm too tired & down to even make a reference to Edward here.)

I haven't cried this hard or this long since my niece died 3 years ago. I feel like I've been slapped, kicked, knocked down, then kicked while I was down & then run over by the garbage truck.

In time, I hope I will be forgiven (including by myself).

*Don't worry, everyone around me is still alive & well. This probably sounds worse than it really is (who said I was a little dramatic?), but I just HATE messing up & making mistakes - especially when it hurts other's feelings.

So, I'm going to take Motherboard's advice & say what I'm grateful for. I'm sure it will help.

I am so grateful for:
  1. A kind, patient, loving husband (btw, it wasn't him I messed up with)
  2. My children
  3. A best friend who understands me better than I understand myself (not her either)
  4. A sister who is the epitome of Christlike behavior
  5. A loving family which I was born into.
  6. Jesus Christ who has given me the chance to repent & do better next time.

13 comments:

Kristina P. said...

Oh, Em. I think we've all been there. I know I sure have. Hang in there!

Darren said...

Nope. Never. I never, ever say the wrong thing. My motor mouth constantly spits only proper phrases and innocent/kind/witty remarks. In fact, what's the matter with you? Don't you know we're supposed to be, like, perfect and stuff?


You're loved and whatever you said, I've said it worse.

*MARY* said...

I used to have this problem back when I talked to people.
I haven't spoken to someone besides my immediate family in 50 years.

You know it's a commandment to leave a comment on this blog, but we're also commanded to forgive, even ourselves.

Wendyburd1 said...

Awww.

Terésa said...

I agree with *Mary* we should all hide in our computers. Wait- *Mary* didn’t say that? I’m sure she said it at one point... in some blog or comment.

The Hillbilly Banjo Queen: said...

Don't worry Em. We have all been there. I liked the part about the garbage truck...when you are down, there is nothing like being run over by a garbage truck to make things worse. :)

Emilee said...

sniff, sniff

I have the nicest bunch of random blogging friends I've never met.

Your comments have made me smile, laugh & even feel better.

Thank you.

BTW - Darren, who are you? Are you a real person? BC you are funny! And Wendy - so nice to meet you.

rychelle said...

does yesterday count?

then, yes. been there. done that.

The Motherboard said...

I do that... like every day. And it totally sucks. I am constantly opening my mouth and inserting the entire shoe department.

Take 2 tylenol and blog me in the morning.


word Verification: Ovatime... yes. that is me. I work WAY to much ovatime...

keri said...

I don't remember exactly what you said to me, but I forgive you. Don't worry any more....Oh, wait, it wasn't me, sorry.

no said...

I don't know what you said, whom you said it to, what made you say it, or why you regret it... but I am proud of you for maybe being the only person willing to "say what needed to be said." Now let's go to lunch and you can give me the only really honest opinion on my new hair color. I promise not to cry if you hate it!

Someone else said...

If you feel up to it, you can look at the silver lining. You got at least 10 comments to your post. Now there, doesn't that make you feel better?

Unknown said...

I kind of felt that way just a couple weeks ago. I felt like I was messing up all the time and felt so bad for myself, I had a huge crying spell for no real good reason (at least you had a good reason). I think it was hormones, thats my excuse. The best thing to do is to write down all the things your grateful for, you are such a sweetheart