Thankful Thursday, the end

Friends Graphic Comments

Thank you to everyone for the kind words of support you gave me after my last post. You really don't suck! There are a lot of nice people out there, who I actually don't know, but who gave me a fake bloggy shoulder to cry on & now I'm a little freaked out. That's okay, because I really am feeling so much better about life. Time does heal all wounds - including the ones I make. It's true.

And really, good things can come out of it too. So, I wanted to copy Kristina P. & do a Thankful Thursday post today - especially since the day will be over in about 2 hours. What? Are you calling me a procrastinator? I'm totally not & someday I'll get back to telling you more about how I'm not.

Today, I am thankful for the opportunity I had this week to cry so hard (& ugly) for about 3 days that I ran out of pee. It was the best! I'll tell you why.

On Sunday, I woke up with a red, painful, ugly sty in my eyelid. An eye sty. I haven't had one of those since middle school when I experienced some of the joys of sharing cheap make up with many girls. The sty hurt. It was really red. Did I mention it was ugly? Anyway, in the midst of my blubbering & self-loathing I did still have the presence of mind to worry about the effect all of those salty tears would have on my eye sty. I mean nobody gets that depressed. I was certain that it was going to get plugged up even worse & would get an even uglier infection which would involve green puss & an eye patch.

I'm so thankful I was wrong. I think the salty tears washed the infection away & by Tuesday night my eye sty was gone. Thank you dear salty tears for the gift of healing powers you bestowed upon my eye.

I am also thankful that the hard crying made me so sick to my stomach that I couldn't eat for 2 days. I'm pretty sure my abs have some definition now. It's great to cry so hard that not only do you lose your appetite, but you feel like puking & don't even want to think about food. So crying got me back in my jeans - that is until I ate for like 4 people today. I was hungry! But I am truly grateful for the way my jeans weren't so freaking tight on me yesterday.

I'm also thankful that I got a sinus infection so that I had a "real" excuse to stay in bed, all day, for 2 days. Since my son broke my nose 5 years ago when he was 2, the sinus passages on the right side of my face don't drain or work or whatever it is that they do, properly, & I get a sinus infection at the first hint of a runny nose. It's happened at least once a year since then. So, since my nose was actually a faucet running at full speed this week means I got a lot of alone time in bed & at the computer & a big pile of used tissues on the floor. I hope someone is going to clean it up soon because it's starting to gross me out.

Which leads me to my sweet Manly & how grateful I am for him. He had pity on me, which translated into extra help around here (not to imply that he's not helpful, he is - but I got even more!). He felt so bad for me, which seriously never happens even though I try to get him to feel that way all the time, that he actually volunteered to get the kids ready for & put to bed. Without me. For 2 nights in a row. I'm starting to feel like an evil genius.

But the thing which I am most grateful for, as a result of my blubbering like a baby (not even a cute one) for the last 3 days, is that I got my goal of at least 10 comments on my last post. Someone Else pointed that out & put a whole new perspective on this for me. That made it totally worth it!

Sad face

(Our dog, Rocket. This is what he had to say when I told him what my friend Mary said about dogs in China.)

Have you ever made a big, HUGE mistake, which no matter how hard you try to remember the magic spells you learned from Harry Potter, you can't make disappear? It will never go away. A mistake, which your small, malnourished, stupid brain made your big, fat, stupid mouth say & hurt the feelings of those you love?

I have.

It sucks. (I'm too tired & down to even make a reference to Edward here.)

I haven't cried this hard or this long since my niece died 3 years ago. I feel like I've been slapped, kicked, knocked down, then kicked while I was down & then run over by the garbage truck.

In time, I hope I will be forgiven (including by myself).

*Don't worry, everyone around me is still alive & well. This probably sounds worse than it really is (who said I was a little dramatic?), but I just HATE messing up & making mistakes - especially when it hurts other's feelings.

So, I'm going to take Motherboard's advice & say what I'm grateful for. I'm sure it will help.

I am so grateful for:

1. A kind, patient, loving husband (btw, it wasn't him I messed up with)
2. My children
3. A best friend who understands me better than I understand myself (not her either)
4. A sister who is the epitome of Christlike behavior
5. A loving family which I was born into.
6. Jesus Christ who has given me the chance to repent & do better next time.
   

I'm ready

Okay. I'm ready to talk about it. And then I'll be done.

I wasn't surprised. I was expecting this result. I'm not scared either, I have hope.

But I still don't like it.

1st a side note, which I guess is more of a top note, politics is a big part of my life. It always has been. Someday I want to be the campaign manager for my best friend, Becky, when she runs for president. When she wins then I'll be the evil BFF advisor & slip a recording of my voice under her pillow at night, repeating over & over what she should do & say as the 1st female Pres. of the USA. Mind control. I'm not above it.

I digress.

I say this because sometimes I will talk politics. I think about it. It concerns me. It's in my head. Since this blog is about what's in my head, I think it's appropriate. But laughter is another big part of my life. I like jokes. I love humor. I adore laughing. Religion, family & Oreo's are also a big part of my life.

My point is, I'm not going to ignore a subject because it may offend someone. If it's important (or trivial) enough to me then it may end up on my blog. And that's okay. But also know that I don't do it to offend. I'm not a mean person. Can't we all have different opinions & still be friends?

But I would like to let you know a little more about me. Who I am. Politically.

I'm not sure what political party I belong to anymore. It's not just because of 1 single person. It takes way more than 1 person to mess up a country. Of course, I'm sure you've all guessed by now, I'm a registered Republican. But I don't know if I am one anymore, this transition has been happening over the last few years.

I'm definitely not a Democrat. (Like that wasn't obvious)

I don't know if I could be considered an Independent or even a Constitutionalist, or any of the other crazy 3rd parties. I'm definitely NOT a Green Party girl - I'll just tell you that right now.

I wish there was a Conservative party because that's what I am. I'm 1st a Conservative. Fiscally, socially, environmentally. Everthinglly. Straight across the board. Also, I make decisions with my head, but it doesn't mean I'm heartless. I think much if not most of the Republican party has left me on conservative issues.

It's also probably not hard to guess who I voted for. Did you read my Scary Story last week? But, it doesn't mean I was excited about McCain either. I was very disappointed in who the Republicans picked as their candidate, I was no supporter. I did vote for him though, because I'm one of those who really believed he was the lesser of two evils. And this country isn't forward enough for a 3rd party crazy president. Give it time. McCain definitely was no fiscal conservative. I don't think he was a real Republican.

I did like "Crazy" Palin....... a lot. I was excited about her. She was the closest one to my conservative values......... she got my vote.

My reaction down below wasn't because the guy I voted for lost. It's because of where I believe we are headed in this country - and where we've been heading for the last 30 years. There is no question that we are going to "Change" as a nation. Starting with the constitution. But I don't believe it's for the better.

What I do believe is (& I say this so you know where I stand, not to try to change your mind because I know that won't happen. Just like mine won't be changed as these are my core beliefs.)

The "Liberal" party is well on it's way to communism. There are certain rights they don't want us to have, including life & speech.

Obama is a Socialist. Of course he's not going to come out & admit that & neither is anyone who wants him to win. But from everything he's said as to how he's going to 'change' the economy, those are socialist values.

The Federal government has gotten WAY TOO BIG. It's out of control & in our lives & pockets way too much. That's not the purpose of the gov. I don't think that helping the poor or giving to those in need should be federally mandated. I think we have a personal, moral responsibility to do it, but the government has no business telling us to.

I believe the Democrat party wants people to be dependent on them.

We are in BIG economic trouble. Dark days are ahead. We did not vote in the right person to take care of it. Granted, I don't think the other one was the right one to take care of this specific issue either. But this one does not have the experience or the beliefs (from what he's said) to do it "correctly". And by correctly I mean, without infringing on our constitutional rights.

I believe we all have the right to keep & bear arms.

I don't think this is the right time to back down on national defense. Are you kidding me?! We need it now more than ever......especially if the terrorists are supporting Obama - I'm just saying....

I believe we should drill for oil in our own country & take care of ourselves. Stop the restrictions. We have the resources. Use them! We will have more restrictions under the new administration. Do we really want to be dependent on foreign oil?

I believe the "bail out" is wrong. I think it will breed more bad economic behavior & decisions. Let businesses fail. Let people lose their homes if they can't afford them. I know, I'm the devil. I just believe in living with the consequences of the choices you make. After the market crashes people will have to figure out where they went wrong & work hard to fix it. Then we'll be a better, stronger country & people & industries will be more responsible. BTW, I'll be the 1st one to help any neighbor in need. Because it's the right thing to do, not because the government tells me to.

I do believe if Obama's daughter makes a "mistake" she should have to pay for it. Killing is wrong - whether born or unborn. Have the baby & then give it up for adoption. I know plenty of people who would be happy to take it.

I don't believe the government should be telling companies how much to pay their employees or make them provide health insurance.

I don't think the government should be socializing medicine. Do you want to die? JK....not really. But, seriously keep it all private. We will all do better that way.

I believe this country is moving away from the core values of our forefathers. I'm passionate about the revolution & the founding fathers & the constitution. I don't believe the New Guy is.

Last night's speech? I wasn't moved. He is a great speaker, no doubt about it. But did you listen to what he was saying? He's already backtracking from what he's "promised".

I think the President of the USA should be an honest, forthcoming, trustworthy individual.

I have more to say, but for your sake I won't.

I have soup to make for the PTA - it's parent/teacher conferences. I need all the emotional strength I have left for that.

I hope we can still be friends.

P.S. I welcome all comments, whether left, right, right or wrong. Just be nice.

My reaction

I still can't talk about it........

The BIG day

Oh my heck! I feel like today is my birthday, wedding, Christmas & like I'm going into labor all shoved together in one crazy package. Like a big, hot, stuffed, delicious burrito, which will eventually leave you with heartburn. I'm really happy & excited yet totally nervous & nauseous at the same time.

It's THE day. Election day. Tuesday, November 4th, 2008.

Also, I have mutual tonight. I always feel a little sick on Tuesdays.


The 1st thing that's making me really happy & excited though, is your commenting skills. I'm so proud of all of you. I would like to thank all of my fabulous readers who worked so hard to get me into the double digits on my last post. Some bloggers have a gift for getting comments. The comments simply come to them like magic (I don't think it has anything to do with their wit or writing skills). Not me. I have to work, as in begging, pleading, coercing, guilt-tripping, really hard for each comment I get.

You exceeded my goal of 10 & got me to 23. It doesn't matter if 8 of those comments were from the same person & 2 of them were from me. The # is there & that's all I needed to feel good about myself. I feel like 23 bucks right now. And all of my wildest dreams have come true. Except for the one where my backside is smaller & not so squishy.

I just hope you guys didn't set yourselves up for failure. I'm going to be expecting at least double digits from now on. No pressure. But, good luck.

The other exciting thing is ...... drum roll please.......I got to vote today. Alone!

Where MY vote counts!

This is the 1st time in 10 years that that has happened. I have always had kids hanging off me, &/or messing/stealing with/from my purse (they learned at a young age that I can't multi-task, like hold a purse & vote at the same time) or bothering other voters by running around in circles screaming 'Look at me! Look at me! Look at me!' They totally get that from their dad. Show off.

In the last presidential election, I showed up with a car seat hanging from each arm, overflowing with 10 month old babies & all of the accessories that go along with them, plus a double stuffed diaper bag. Today I was alone. I could set my purse down - worry free. It was quiet, except for when I started yelling, 'look at me. look at me, look at me.' (I wasn't as loud as my kids though. I only had lower case 'l's & periods.) Unlike those around me, I voted in peace.

I love preschool.

I also love these cute ladies. The pollsters. How cool.

They are all neighbors of mine & they run the voting booths. I totally want to join their group. I asked a couple of years ago if I could, but I'm still waiting to hear back. Hmmmm.

When I mentioned it to them, again & told them that I was free for the next 2 hours & wanted to hang out, they looked at me like this.....

Okay. Maybe Not. I'll just go home & blog.

Well, I've done my part. It's out of my hands now. As far as I'm concerned the polls are closed.

I'm going to take a picture to prove that I voted, but 1st I need to make sure no one is looking & that weird guy is gone.....

Here it is, my proof of voting today. Hands off! It's mine. I worked hard for this sticker & I am going to wear it with pride all day long.

Can you guess what I'm going to do tonight?

After Mutual.

I'll give you a hint:

Chillax. Relax. Chill out. Hang out.

Except not at the pharmacy in Walmart. At home. On the sofa. In front of the T.V.

Watching. Waiting. Anticipating. Crying. Eating. Crying..........

HAPPY VOTING!!!

I'm hungry

I woke up this morning blogging in my head. It was going to be a killer post, I think it's one that would have won at least 10 comments, which is my goal for the month. If I could get at least 10 comments to a single post, that would make all my wildest dreams come true, either that or if I vote for Pedro. I know. I'm shooting high. Dream on you say. Is that a challenge? I think it is. I'm so going to do it.....

Anyway.

I don't remember how it ended. I don't think it did. I got distracted by trying to get myself & my children ready for church, while fasting on an empty stomach. I don't think straight under those circumstances. My brain is all over the place right now, but I've got a lot of good things to say (I just know it), things that you want to know. Maybe some things you could answer. So, I'm going to share, at random, my thoughts, which are more like questions that I can't answer.

***

Why didn't I take any pictures of my kids on Halloween? I remembered the camera this time, I just didn't think to use it. I'm totally kicking myself right now.

Ouch!

Now the rest of the cyber world will never get to see Lundles as a scary secretary (wearing my clothes!), or Epee as the smiliest grim reaper ever, or Hoodee as a terrified ninja, or Sidysue as.......as......I don't know what because I forgot to take pictures, so how am I supposed to remember?

Actually, I don't know what she was because she changed her clothes so many times during the day that I lost track. I remember she started out as Sleeping Beauty, then she was a pink poodle for a while, that turned into Snow White, but the one that stuck, which means the outfit she had on when it was time to leave, was some funky combination of whatever dress-ups she found in her box.

***

Why does my chest hurt & I feel like I can't breath when I think about election day, Tuesday, November 4th? I think I'm going to puke.

***


Why didn't I have a good hair day today? Why does my hair turn out okay on some days & others it just looks like poo? What makes the difference if I'm spending the same amount of time & product on it? FYI, 2 mins is a sufficient amount of time to spend on my hair. Have you noticed how it keeps growing shorter?

***
I'm so glad we didn't buy costumes this year. I would've totally been like the evil stage mother making the kids, & by kids I mean Sidysue, look how I wanted them/her to look.

Telling the kids to come up with their own costumes was the smartest thing Manly has said since he told me I was perfect.

***
Why is it such a big deal to me that someone I'm closely related to is voting for someone who I think is the devil.... for President of the USA? I know it shouldn't matter, after all that's one of the many things I love about this country - the freedom to vote, but it's killing me. Maybe I should be in charge of voting this year. I would feel a lot better about that.

***
I wonder if Manly knows about my secret crush on Rush Limbaugh (don't worry, he won't find out this way. He would have to actually read my blog. Like that would happen.) I can't get enough of that guy (Rush)- he's awesome. *Swoon. I totally cried when I found out about his addiction to pain killers, 5 years ago. I felt like my world had been turned upside down. It took me days before I could even talk about it without breaking into the ugly cry. That could have also been due to the fact that I was pregnant with twins.

***
Welcome November. I love the beginning of each month. It's always full of hope & anticipation & we have $...... at the beginning, unlike the middle & end. I really am happy to welcome in November, especially if it keeps on being 68-70 degrees like yesterday (remember, I'm in Idaho - brrrrr). I'll take it. Yesterday was awesome, even Friday night was pretty good for trick or treating. Today is rainy, windy & cold so I'm just going to keep pretending it's yesterday.

***
Why does the government stick its nose in places where it doesn't belong? Like time management. Daylight savings is stupid. I'm glad we're off it now because it's stupid. But then why am I so tired today even though I got an extra hour of sleep? Or did I get an extra hour? It's a conspiracy.

***
Why don't people I'm related to leave me comments? Don't they understand how my self esteem is wrapped up in that little # at the bottom of each post? It gives me my self worth. PLEASE!.......I mean, why?

***
I'm curious if people are even still reading this. Maybe they'll leave me a comment to 1)let me know, 2)build-up my self-esteem &/or 3)both.

***
It's kind of freaking me out that my 4 year old, Hoodee, just asked me if he can have some candy for his evil baby. Duh. No. Candy is only for good, righteous babies.

***
This Halloween was the best one ever. Taking the kids to a neighborhood they don't know & setting them loose while Manly & I sat in my sis-in-laws warm house eating homemade chili & drinking hot cocoa while the kids worked for our dessert. What could be better than that?

***
I don't believe in child labor laws.

I'm finished. If you have any answers, ideas or just want me to feel good about myself......you know what to do.

Spontaneously Fun

In my past life, when I was a teenager, I was up for pretty much anything. I did have my limits & standards, but it may have been an understatement to have described me as spontaneous & fun-loving. Uh, yeah, slightly. The long lunches with friends on Wednesdays, or Fridays or any day of the week for that matter? Typical. The middle of the night road trips to Eugene (1.5 hours away)? Sure, why not. Going to the movies instead of math class? Do you even have to ask? Today those things might be called truant or delinquent or stealing (some consider it stealing when one drives their parents car to Eugene {full of friends} without permission). Believe it or not, I wasn't a bad kid, just a little crazy, lazy & irresponsible. In college (yes, I said college - I even graduated. Ha!), I was still up for pretty much anything. The all-nighters....... not studying, but staying up all night talking & playing. The middle of the night snowball fights. And I even came this close (picture thumb & finger squeezing together) to surprising my parents at home in Portland, a 12 hour drive, one weekend. If only my roommate & I had had enough gas $ we would have totally been there. Some people around me (actually everyone I'm related to) would say, and have said, Thank goodness she snapped out of it, I didn't have much hope for her. Rude, huh? But true.

Sigh.

Those were the days, and they are over. I got married, became a mother & grew up. In that order. I traded spontaneity for a routine, scheduled life & that's okay. It's better than okay, it's what I want. I enjoy who & what I am now. The responsible (stop snickering) wife & mother, the active member of my church, the classroom & community volunteer (also, please stop rolling your eyes. I'm just saying, that's how awesome I really am.). I am grateful for all of it & what I get to do every day (wiping bums excluded. I am truly not going to miss that.) But recently I've had a few simple experiences which have reminded me how being spontaneous can be like a breath of fresh air on a smoggy day. *Not that I'm comparing my children or husband to smog. It's me, sometimes I get smoggy.


Late one evening last week I got on the computer to "turn it off", *ahem. But, at just the right moment I received an instant message from a good friend of mine here in town (she's also a blogging buddy, I would like her better if she would leave more comments on my blog {hint hint} but I'm still a good friend to her. Anyway...) When that first message popped up on the screen I got all nervous & excited at the same time, just like how I felt when I was faced with the prospect of either going to the mall to try on formals or going to English class. At first I really wasn't sure if my friend actually meant to be I.M.ing me. Could this be a mistake, because I just don't do things like this. Did she really want to talk to me? Why? I'm not cool. I was just so confused. So after I made sure that it wasn't a mistake, I totally relaxed & started chatting & laughing. She called me an I.M. virgin & I called her an I.M. sl_t. Both are true & it was so great - total bonding experience! It was one of those things that just spontaneously happened. No planning. No scheduling. It just happened, I went with the flow & it was simply fun.



The week before that, I had gone over to another friends house, after FHE on Monday night, (to plan the pretty table) with the intention to get our plan on paper, make a list and go home. Soon after I arrived we started talking linens & then she asked, 'Do you want to run to Dillard's in Idaho Falls, before the mall closes?' Me? Can I do that? I.F. is a half hour away. My initial thought was, I can't do that. It's not planned, I should say no. But I couldn't think of 1 good reason why I shouldn't. It just wasn't scheduled - so what?! Manly was home with the kiddies getting them in bed. FHE was over. Dishes were done. I was good. So I agreed. Why not?! I felt like such a rebel (in a non-truant way), like those long lunches downtown giggling with friends. Going to I.F. last minute - unplanned - was spontaneous & fun. We had a great time & I felt young again.



There's more. The week before that a different, different friend (I know, 3 friends. I have 3 friends. These 3 friends will remain nameless because I don't want to spook them. If I publicly claim them as my friends I'm pretty sure they will mock me & denounce any claims of friendship I have made.) called me on a Saturday morning to see if I wanted to go down to Utah with her for the weekend. She lives in I.F. & was therefore a half hour away as she had just started driving. Um, can I even do that? Can I just pick up and leave for the weekend? Is that legal for a conservative wife & mother to do? Who am I, who does she think I am? After that brief identity crisis, came the answer.

It just so happened that Manly was sitting right there when she called because his big hunting plans for the weekend had been canceled. Then came the miracle. He agreed to it, & to do the whole taking kids to church by himself on Sunday thing. What!? Are you serious? I think he's even more spontaneous than I am (JK, that's like an insult to Manly, you are the most routine, responsible person there is!). 20 minutes later I was dressed, packed & on the road to Utah. I can't even describe in words how nervous, excited & happy I felt all at the same time. Those road trips to Eugene, had nothing on this unplanned, spontaneous weekend getaway to Utah. But the feelings were quite similar. My friend dropped me off on the side of the road, my mom picked me up & we had a great time. Totally unplanned & spontaneous. One of the best 2 days ever!

As I said before, I'm glad I've changed. I love being a responsible adult. I'm grateful my kids have at least one good parent to look up to (JK again, Manly. You're responsible too.) I wouldn't change the type of life I have, or who I am. But it has been so refreshing & fun to have these brief encounters with my past. To feel young & carefree again, even if just for an hour, or a day. They have made me laugh, smile & have fun.

What did I do?!

Really, the question is what did I NOT do?

As I was perusing through Mormon Mommy Blogs today I came across a title which interested me. I thought it would make me feel better about myself. It was over at the Bingham Diaries, titled, Hi. I'm MomBabe and I'm an Idiot. I thought to myself, Cool. I'm a Mom & a Babe too, but maybe I'm not as big of an idiot as she is. Well, it didn't work. What her post did was made me realize that 1st: I like this girl & 2nd: I'm an even bigger idiot than she is! At least she caught her mistake, I didn't realize I had made one until she told me. What is this all about? I will tell you.

It has to do with a Cause, a Contest & a certain blogger named Sue. I bet most of you know about all of the different, fabulous fundraising efforts going on to support & help the NieNie recovery. You know, that beautiful couple (the Nielson's) who miraculously survived that tragic plane crash 2 months ago. They are the ones that we can all relate to & have a hard time believing that something so random like this would happen to them (even though we don't know them). Because being the semi-egocentric beings that we are we imagine ourselves in their position since we too have 4 young children who we stay home with & since we also share the same faith. So we just can't imagine going through something like that & we want to help. Our hearts, prayers & accounts go out to them.

Well, the aforementioned Sue, who I also bet most of you know (in a bloggy way), wanted to do something to help. So she started a contest for bloggers to submit their clever blog entry's either previously published, but preferably not, to a book that she wants to publish, sell & donate the proceeds of which to the Nie Recovery Fund. What a great cause!

I kept that idea in the back of my head & rolled it around a few times before I actually did anything about it. The deadline for the contest was Sept. 30, & according to true Em fashion I submitted my entry either on Sept. 29th or 30th (are you kidding me? I can't remember that far back). I just know I got my entry in before the very end of the deadline.

Before I ever entered the contest I had read through Sue's blog entry about the contest a few times and once again in true Em fashion I thought to myself, she doesn't mean me. Mine would never get picked. I'm not good enough to enter something like this. I'm not funny or clever. Only confident people enter contests & I'm totally not like that. You know, I was lifting myself up & being a true to form female. But in the end I decided not to listen to myself & do it anyways. A sentence at the end of the post caught my attention. The part where she said something like, "If you're not sure if you're funny enough, don't worry." Okay, so maybe she was talking to me. And I entered.

This is where the problem comes in. I did read her whole blog post, I just didn't necessarily understand all of the rules for submission. I guess I was supposed to backlink to her post about this contest & to the Nie Recovery site before the deadline. Like many of you, I have my Nie button on the side bar of my blog, so I thought I was good. From what I'm being told now, I wasn't. This is the part where you remember that I'm a BIG idiot too (not that MomBabe is because if it wasn't for her, I would have always assumed I was rejected because my submission wasn't funny enough.) Not that I've been rejected yet, I don't know what's going on at this point. But. If I don't get in the book, now I can always assume that it was because of being an idiot & not understanding the rules clearly & not because I'm not funny. Because I totally am. And that would make the rejection easier to take.

So, if any of you who have anything to do with this wonderful cause are reading this, remember, I'm sorry. I made an honest mistake. I don't speak computer so words like backlink just go over my head & I pretend I don't see them, because obviously they weren't meant for me. But now that I've been shown the error of my ways I've tried really hard to rectify the situation. I hope I've gotten enough backlinks in the right places to the right sites. Like MomBabe said, I really hope it's not too late. Please. Not that I'm begging because I don't do that. PlEASE!

Also, Thanks again to my new friend & fellow idiot MomBabe. BTW, you're not an idiot. You've helped me out a great deal here.

Tag, you're IT!....the 2nd

So I've been tagged again. I'm really trying hard not to let it go to my head. I know you're all thrilled to learn more about me, & you know I'm totally not a bragger {I really don't like to talk about myself} but since you asked for it how can I refuse? Here's a little insight into the wonderful world of Manly & Me:

1. Where did you 1st meet your husband? We were both living in a little town in the Pacific Northwest called, Utensils. I was 16 when I moved there to live with my Dad. On my 1st day at my strange new high school, I sat next to him in Biology class. He had the most beautiful, powdery white skin & scary yet inviting black eyes. At first I totally thought he hated me with a PASSION! He wouldn't even look at me. He was so tense & rigid, like he was about to body slam the next person to cross his path. I almost asked him what his problem was when he slammed his books closed & stormed out of class...... Oh, wait. That wasn't me.

I guess we met at Ricks. I had this really beautiful roommate & Manly wanted to meet her. He met me instead and the rest is history. It was his lucky day.

2. What was the 1st thing you said to him? Hey hotty, you're hot! JK, it was something profound like, Nice to meet you.

3. Where was your 1st date? In Rexburg, Idaho. Duh.

4. Where was your 1st kiss? On the lips. So this is starting to get a little personal, I'm not sure I like where this line of questioning is going.

5. Did you have a long or short engagement/courtship? I don't want to talk about it. This is the only thing on which we disagree. So, I won't go there. Sorry, you lose.

6. Where did you get engaged? We were living in a quaint little village nestled in the countryside of England. He had arrived unannounced with his friend for a visit & we subsequently went for a stroll down the country lane. I was thanking him for the help he gave my family in the retrieval of my wayward sister, from the odious fiend, Mr. Wickam. He wouldn't let me go on in my profuse gratitude, he claimed he only did it because of his love for me......... dang, not me again.

At his sister's house in Rexburg, ID. He was living with her & her family while attending college. He made me a candlelight dinner & had my ring in an Easter basket (because it was Valentine's when we got engaged of course.). Fun, huh? I actually like this story too.

7. Where did you get married? The Portland LDS Temple. It was the coolest because we had flaming liberal protesters there who were picketing us as we drove away from the temple. They were so concerned for our welfare as they told us how it's all a scam and we're not married for eternity. I really appreciated their sincerity & interest in our lives. And they did add a lot of joy to our day.

8. How did the reception go? If you had been there you would know that you missed the most totally awesome party to ever happen in an LDS church. That's all I have to say. You should have been there.

9. How was the honeymoon? That's IT! I'm done. No more questions. You have crossed the line. BTW, for the record it was hot.........we were at the beach in August.

Now, I don't know if I'm comfortable with passing this Tag on. It's a little scandalous! But if you want to then I won't stop you. I am a little curious about my blogging buddies whom I don't actually know. If you're interested go ahead, make my day.

Miss me?

PHEW! Last week is over. I survived, which I seriously had doubts would happen. So now I'm back. Did you miss me? I missed you. Each time I was doing something I didn't want to do, like hosting a big, out of control birthday party with 10, 10 & 11 year old squealing girls, my mind would go to it's happy place & I would think about blogging & you blogging. 'I wonder what my blogging friends are blogging about right now', crossed my mind more than once. So here's a recap of what kept me from my computer last week:
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1. Monday @ midnight (technically it's really Tuesday morn but who cares, I was tired) making these napkin rings:

We'll come back to this on Saturday.

2.Tuesday morning. Getting children ready.

Hey Hoodee & Sidysue, where are you going today?

It's your 1st day of Preschool! Hallelujah!!!


3. Tuesday night (after mutual). Staying up late again...

making these for Lundles school class on Wed.:

Sweet Sushi anyone?

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4. Wednesday. Making this:

And this: (the b-day dinner, chicken pillows & chips)

So the b-day girl will do this:

Happy Birthday Lundles.......again.

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5. Thursday. Neighbor calls & invites us over.....making children happy. Run children, Run!

because they get to do this:

Thank you Janice!

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6. Friday: Clean, clean, clean. Hanging these up:

Setting this:

So the dining room will look like this:

For the friend party, which ended up like this:

Trust me, they were not as sweet & quiet as they look in this picture. WHERE'S A VALIUM?!

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7: Saturday. Remember the napkin rings? They were for this:

The Pink Tea in Pocatello. It's a fundraiser to raise money for women to get mammograms. It's a breast cancer awareness thing. My friend Jaeme asked me to help her set a table for it. Here's her beautiful centerpiece & our table:

So that was my week & I reserve all the bragging rights to which I am entitled (even though I really hate that word, because that mindset is what's wrong with society today......sorry, tangent). I normally don't do really neat, creative & lovely things like these so I'm showing the world.

3 Things

Thing 1: Shout out!

I heart my new layout, it should last at least a week. I think blogs should be changed & updated like bags & shoes, actually I don't think that about your blogs, just mine. I like to makeover anything that will stand still for longer than a minute. So blogs are perfect for me. I love all of the fun, new & different looks out there & someday I might even put some $ into it. But let's not get ahead of ourselves. I would like to give a big blogger shout out to Julie at Leelou. Love her site & all of her fun templates. She is definitely a creative & talented WAHM. She is also very helpful to minimally brain functioning beings such as myself. Thank you Julie, for everything, I love it!

Thing 2: More to come.

I have a lot to post & will get to it soon. This is the BIG birthday week. Tomorrow is the BIG day for Lundles. And Friday is her BIG friend party. We don't do BIG every year for birthdays, but last year was especially unacceptable. Manly had started his office at this time last year & we told the kids they would be lucky to see their next birthday with us (we heard there were some really good private schools in Pakistan, who really wanted American kids to join them. They would pay for their travel expenses & room & board. Although the rate of return is very low. It sounded like a great deal.). Well, they're still here so we told them they could each have a friend party this year. As I've been trying to get things ready, I keep asking myself why we ever told them that. BIG is overrated. Pakistan is sounding pretty good right now.

Thing 3: Find pictures of Lundles.

Thing 4: Make cake & fake sushi.

Thing 5: Make dinner.

Thing 6: Shave legs.

Thing 7: Oops, did I post that out loud? I have a lot on my mind.

Thing 8: Post about why mom's should get all the credit for their kids birthday's. Why are we celebrating them? What did they do? They just came out, because we made them, against their will. Everyone, including said birthday person, should be celebrating the mother who went through the 9 months of whatever you'd like to call it (depending on if you're a glass 1/2 empty or full type of person), only to top it off with the delivery. And then all those months of sleepless days & nights to feed & care for, said birthday person. Those are the real heroes, the mothers. Being ripped to shreds isn't my idea of fun. My memory isn't short. I haven't forgotten, oh no! But I did it, to give you life. You owe me & so does everyone else who enjoys said creation of Manly & me. Oops, did I post that out loud too? That's totally not like me. I better go now.

He's so lucky.....again!

So, if you haven't guessed by now, I'm slightly obsessed with being a member of MoTab. I may have hinted at it a time or two before, like here & here. This past weekend as we were so reverently & peacefully (do I even need to clear my throat here?) watching general conference, which was THE BEST - consider me totally uplifted & edified, I started having another of my non-delusional conversations with Manly, in my head.

You guys, he is so sweet!

He was making his arguments about why I should be in the choir, how they need me & why they are the ones who are totally missing out. He's right, but still it's not very ladylike to say those things myself, it's so braggy (& as you all know, I'm not like that). But he made me swear I would blog about this 1st thing Monday morning because he's just so darned proud of me. I can't break a promise. Once again, I'm only going to give you his top 5 reasons (out of the countless ones he came up with) why I should be a member of MoTab:

1. My great fashion sense. If I were a member you'd see a lot more hot pink, bright green, bangles, bobbles & skin. Oh, & mandatory make-up. He admires my horse-sense when it comes to appearances.

2. I can sing. If you've ever received one of my singing emails then you already know that. He told me there's not a sound on earth that brings as much joy to his soul as the last note of the song I'm singing. You guys! How sweet. Anyway, I can hold those loooooong notes at the end without doing all of that staggered breathing & without fainting. I know the rest of them have to take breaths.

3. The camera loves me. Like he said, I simply belong on t.v. I would look really good singing up there especially when the camera zooms in on me & I would have a sweet, peaceful, angelic look on my face (without braces - not that there's anything wrong with that). Plus he said I'm hot.

4. I'm the best wife ever. He thinks that's one of the requirements to get in. He's probably right on both accounts.

5. I'm so much fun! He could totally picture what those choir practices would be like with me there to liven up the party. It would be non-stop, side splitting fun & games! Just think, whoopee cushions on the organists bench & spiders on the guys seats. He loves my practical jokes on him, they would too.

There you have it. The Manly, in my head, did it again. He totally made my weekend! As I sang along with the choir the past couple of days, & no one told me to shut it (why would they? besides that's a totally bad word in our house), I could really tell that they wished I was there singing with the choir too.

Delusions of Grandeur

Last week I was thinking about my Things To Do Before I Die list. It was on my mind because my sister had emailed pictures of her fabulous trip to Jerusalem......the one in Israel. I know, totally on my list. I'm pretty sure I know how you're feeling right now and before I go any further I would just like to say, Chill out! I know you'll feel terrible if I die tomorrow and didn't get to go to Jerusalem, but seriously, I'll be dead. So I don't think I'll even care at that point. It's just one of those lists I have for myself. You know that kind of list with all of the amazing life goals that never actually get accomplished (unless you're Bill Gates or Oprah), but just knowing you thought of them and wrote them down makes you feel really cool. The list goes on:
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Learn Spanish. My family and I go to the Spanish Branch in our stake. *For those non-Mormon readers out there - we go to church with Spanish speakers. Also, I would like to say, Welcome or Bienvenidos. People of all different religions, beliefs, political views, hair lengths, colors, shapes, languages & sizes are welcome - unless your eyes are violet and then I'm totally jealous of you. Okay, you're still welcome, I just had to get that out in the open so there's no awkwardness between us. It doesn't matter what church we go to, we're all still members of this great big dysfunctional human family. I'm thinking that someday I'll post a list of common Mormon vernacular & acronyms - I use 'em all the time. Maybe I should add that to my life to-do list. Anyway.....

Manly is fluent, I'm so not. I know I should be by now (we have been going to the branch for 2 years), but have you ever tried to learn another language? That was rhetorical. I don't want to hear your success story...this is about me right now. It's really hard! People say that Spanish is one of the easiest languages to learn. I keep telling that to myself & reminding me that, 'If I can learn English (yes, it is my native tongue.....but still), which is way more difficult than Spanish, then I can learn Spanish.' But it's just not coming to me. Studying might help, but seriously, who has time for that? Yes, rhetorical again.

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Invent something.

I'm still trying to think of something to invent, but when I do it'll be AMAZING! It's going to be something that will help people, & at the same time look really stylish sitting on their shelf. It can't be too expensive because everyone will want it. And if everyone wants it, it'll have to be mass-produced. Okay, then I'll have to find a really good manufacturer with state of the art production lines that have all the latest robots & equipment. I'll also need to get in touch with the best patent attorney out there who will be able to see the vision of this product and how it'll transform our world as we know it. Top notch marketing will be a must - only the best for the best....... I'm getting ahead of myself here. I would like to invent something.

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Sing with the MoTab choir.

Love them! All I would need to do is be an incredible singer & sight reader/reader of music in general, live in Utah & actually be invited to participate. But have you heard them sing? They rock - not literally, they're AWESOME! I love to sing. I'm not bad, but I'm a dreadful sight reader. I'm pretty sure that most, if not all, of the MoTabians can look at a sheet of music and just start singing it without accompaniment, or a fellow singer standing next to them, who knows what they're doing, that they can copy. And I don't live in Utah, probably never will. But, If I ever get terminally ill that's what I would wish for. And don't go getting all sappy again, be happy for me that I would get to do something on my list.

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Travel back in time.

Probably not going to happen, but if it does I would like to meet: Micheal Landon, to tell him he was the BEST t.v. dad ever (I pattern my parenting after Ma & Pa Ingalls) & that Little House was the best show ever made and to quit smoking (& then I'll totally be a hero for saving his life.) Benjamin Franklin, I'm a huge fan, plus I went to Franklin High School in Portland, and we were the Quakers. I've always wondered if he thought that was a dorky mascot or not. Pope Joan, to find out if she was a real person or not. My Grandma Elsie, to tell her sorry for running over her, when I was 5, with her Cadillac. I would also like to be a fly on the wall in the Salem witch trials, wouldn't want to be there because I know they would totally think I was a witch, but I could be a fly. (As long as fly swatters weren't invented yet. Okay, they were drowning people to see if they survived to prove they really were witches so they could kill them. Of course they hadn't invented fly swatters yet).

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Make a million dollars. This will come with the invention.

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Become a funny philanthropist. I mean come on! We all love the rich guy, or gal in my case, who gives away her money to worthy charities, but it's the funny one who gets the laughs. I'm just saying....

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Travel - I started writing a long list of where I want to go, and then it wasn't funny anymore, it was just a list. So basically I want to go everywhere in the world including this beach (on this plane - cool, huh?).

I think this & the philanthropic endeavors will also come after the invention. I better get working on that.

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Win a major award.

I don't even care what it is, I'm not picky. It could be anything like: the Nobel Peace Price, the Pulitzer Prize, Mother of the Year, or an Oscar, or Mrs. America, how about Best Invention of the Century, or Philanthropist of the year, the Purple Heart would be great, or some cool blogging award. Anything will do.

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This is my list. I never realized how much potential I don't have and how delusional I appear in writing until I actually see it in print before me. Depressing. But at least I'm realistic. Now you can help me & yourself: leave a comment. Seriously. Then you won't feel so guilty when I die and you're thinking, 'oh, how sad she didn't even get to do any of those things on her life list and now she's dead and will never have the chance again.' Maybe I can win some kind of blogging award by getting a lot of comments. Even if I don't know you, leave a comment. You won't regret it, you see I'll come & check you out & it'll be a win-win situation.

*Haunting voice from the dead*: "leeeaavvveee a commmmennnt"

NOT worth the wait.

As I was waiting today, I started thinking about what I was waiting for & how it totally wasn't worth it. What was I waiting for? My yearly exam. The yearly exam. If you're a female, you know.

BUT WAIT! Keep reading (if you are a male, or an innocent type, or my husband, you're probably thinking - I've read enough of this trash). Don't worry, I'm not going into any detail. There will be no gore, no potty talk or any description of any kind. Just some observations.

For example, I waited 45 minutes to get into my room, while 3 other people who came in after me, went out before me. That's not cool (starting my belly-breathing). I admit, when I go to an appointment, of any kind, I quite enjoy the token 5-10 minute wait. It's my chance to peruse and read the magazines and newspapers which I'm too cheap to buy. But 45 minutes is a little much. Did I mention there were 3 other people who came in after me and were called out before me? Whatever. Since I'm a giver I decided to give them the benefit of the doubt. Maybe they were having a really busy morning. Seriously, have you noticed how many pregnant women there are out there? Anyway, my turn finally came and I thought I saw a trace of remorse on the nurse's face (or maybe it was indigestion 'cause she's prego too.) as she moved quickly around to get me into my room, take my blood pressure & give me the drill down.

Surely, they wouldn't keep me waiting any longer, especially now that I'm in the room, donning the coveted hospital gown with a thin sheet on my lap and my feet freezing to death. They should hand out footies. Actually they (my insurance company, the government & whoever else is in on this) should pay me to come to this kind of an appointment, because we all know that if you go then you don't get whatever it is they're checking for. In typical Em fashion, my too-active mind kept telling me how this was totally NOT worth the wait. And then started rhetorically asking in it's mocking tone, you're actually paying for this? Why? I hate waiting. FYI, I do have a little bit of a problem with patience when it comes to the improper use of time due to fruitless waiting. I started thinking about ways I could get some money out of this, then those thoughts wandered to shopping, and ended up waiting in line at Walmart. And my mind was on a roll for the next half hour of waiting. Yeah, I know.

Because I was in an irritated mood, I started thinking about other things that aren't worth waiting for and then on to my pet peeves. Like, it bugs me when there are 20+ (are there that many? either way, you get the point) check out lines at Walmart with only 2 or 3 open at a time. Since it is about the only place to shop in my town, that makes for long lines on certain days. Never go on a Saturday (unless it's between the hours of 6:00 - 8:00 a.m., or you're toast) that's all I'm saying. Also, it bothers me when people adopt a baby and then get divorced. There just seems to be something ironically twisted about that. I don't get it. (Remember, this is irritated Em thinking out loud - anything goes.) Then, naturally, various eating sounds started roaming through my head. Ew. Just for the record, your eating sounds don't bother me, it seems to be just my family members who make the really annoying noises. Another thing that wasn't worth the wait was, Breaking Dawn. Man, I was so disappointed with that book, especially after the last 9 months of waiting. Like a pregnancy. At least you get a baby (or 2, or 3) out of a pregnancy. That's worth the wait, this book wasn't. And then.........

KNOCK. KNOCK.

She-Dr., "Hello, Em. Are you ready?" "Sure am." Really saying in my head, " No. I think I need another 2 years to WAIT. Are you kidding me? Do you have any idea how long I've been waiting? I've been ready since the 8th grade! Oh, man. What does my babysitter think of me by now?" And then that's it. It's over. Remember how I like to time everything? Yes, I did. It didn't even take 5 minutes. I waited all that time for less than 5 minutes of complete humiliation. I had my dignity stripped away in a matter of minutes, and I'm paying money for that? What-ev-er. And then of course, because I was having bad thoughts in my head, my Dr. is totally cool. She treats me like I'm her new best friend and then I'm wondering when we can do lunch. I get dressed, she promply comes back in, totally sits down and shoots the breeze with me, while wearing the cutest dress, and telling me about how............. she's pregnant. Of course.

Cyber stalking

No, don't worry, I'm not being cyber-stalked. If only I could be so lucky. At this point in my blogging life I'm begging everyone I know to read it & leave comments - even if they think I'm a big dork. And hoping that people I don't know will stumble across it and visit for a minute then leave a charming little message. I'm trying to get discovered by the big blogging agents who are hanging out at the blogging malls waiting to discover the next big blogger. Me. Hasn't happened. Anyways.

Since I'm not a guilt trip type of person, I'm totally not going to say how I thought you were really my friends & family & if you loved me you'd do it. (Ew, I sound like the bad boyfriend. Don't ever give into him. In fact, break up with him right now & never talk to him again. You're way better than that. He doesn't deserve you. But totally do what I say.) Okay, FYI, I have a problem with tangents. I do them. A lot. So back to my point.

Today, as I've been stalki.....reading other people's blogs, whom I don't know, I've noticed that most of them have 2 things in common. They don't have many pics of their kids, if any, (definitely not the kind that are cluttering up the sides of their blogs) & they, well not many anyways, aren't using their families real names. I thought this was just because they didn't like their kids, or they weren't cute or something.

Then the light bulb in my brain turned on as I was reading through a post. This gal mentioned avoiding cyber-stalkers. Initially I didn't think much about . I mean isn't that what we all want? Someone to read our blog & be like, 'I like this blog I'm going to follow it'? But then my imagination started to take control. I started thinking about the word STALKER, & all of the unpleasant images it conjures up. Then, I started thinking about what a cyber-STALKER might try to do with our info. & pics & names of my family. It freaked me out and I was positive that my family & I were going to be next. Then I snapped out of it.

But, it left me a little freaked out & sweaty. So, I went back and changed the names of my family members - to goofy ones, but if you know us then it doesn't matter what I call them. You know who I'm talking about. And if you don't know us then you can think - 'wow they gave their kids really goofy names'. So, now I understand why some of you have gone private and why some of you call your kids #1, #2 ......you get the point. And to those of you I don't know, I'm sorry that I thought your kids probably aren't cute. I bet they're adorable, but you'll probably need to post a picture to prove it.

He's So Lucky

I'm a dreamer. I dream, I daydream, I fantasize, I converse in my head. The wheels in my head are usually spinning out of control. Some people say it's an over-active imagination, others simply call it procrastination, & yet there are those who sum it up to adult ADD - probably. I'm the kid in the movies who sits and stares out the window dreaming about how I'm the nerdy girl & no one likes me. They all make fun of me & trip me in the halls & shove me into my locker until the cutest boy in school asks me out because he sees that spark of beauty deep down inside of me. And I tell him, 'No way!', because I've got a great personality, I totally know who I am. I'm one of those spicy, sarcastic type of girls who's great at bantering & so that makes the cute boy want me all the more & everyone else is like, 'What does he see in her?'....... And then the cranky he-teacher snaps me out of my daydream and totally embarrasses me. So then, I start daydreaming about how I'll get my revenge on him & everyone else in the class who was laughing.......

Anyways, my mind doesn't seem to slow down much when I'm unconscious either. It's very rare for me to have a dreamless night. And, about once a year or so, I'll have these blockbuster dreams that are like epoch trilogies. Sometimes, they'll go on for 2 or 3 nights in a row (not recurring, the to-be-continued kind). I'll get so wrapped up in them that I can't wait to go to sleep the next night to find out what happens next and then when I do, I'll have a completely different dream. It's like someone turned the channel. I'm sorry but, The Love Boat just won't do when you've been anticipating Lost all day. Ugh. I never find out what happens. I mean, come on! Did I ever get away from the bad vampires after I escaped their English dungeon (can you guess what I've been reading lately?) & save the little children in the daycare who were right in their path leading to me? Did I ever get to the attic in my grandma's house in Portland, the last safe place on earth for me to be, in time? Who knows, because I wake up and can't ever get my unconscious brain back to the right channel.

I also have lots, & I mean a lot (for the most part this is about the only adult interaction I get during the day) of conversations, with people, in my head. I mostly talk to Manly in my head, but sometimes if I have a conflict with someone, like a jerky painter, then I'll go over that conversation in my head before he arrives. I imagine what he'll say, then what I'll say to that, and then what he'll say back (trying to be all cool) & then I'll totally burn him with a great one-liner. Of course, when he actually does show up I don't say any of it out loud and he's the one getting in all of the punches with the rude things he says. And I just take it - whatever.

But, I can totally predict how these conversations are going to go in my head. In the past when I have tried to have these conversations with Manly.....out loud......in real life, I usually ended up getting mad because he didn't follow the script and he would start saying the wrong things. I felt like stomping my foot & yelling, 'That's not how it's supposed to go! Try again!' And maybe that happened once or twice.....I can't remember. So for the sake of the family, our marriage, his sanity and the peace in our home (ahem) I've learned to keep those kind of conversations in my head. Until now.

I recently had a very, um, descriptive talk with Manly, in my head, in which he was telling me why he's the luckiest man in the world to be married to me. Sweet, huh? So of course I'm going to share, but really there's not enough time to tell you everything he said. Honestly, I don't want to brag. Some people are really full of themselves & I'm totally not like that. So here's Manly's (the Manly that was talking in my head) top 5 reasons why he's so lucky.

1. I sacrifice. I make a lot of sacrifices for him and his children (yes, I did incubate & bear them, but I like to give him all the credit for them. I'm generous that way.). For example, making dinner for them when I could be doing something else like reading a book or watching one of my chick-flicks. Or not spending a lot of $ on home decor & shoes when there is really so much that I want. I love how in my head he gets that. He so understands how many things there are out there that I want to buy & don't & what a toll it takes on me.

2. I'm a giver. I'm constantly giving him free advice - he doesn't even have to ask for it. I give him advice on everything like how to style his hair, what clothes to wear & even how to rub my feet more effectively. There is never a shortage on the advice I give him. He can't get enough.

3. I never complain. About 6 months ago our dishwasher wasn't working. I didn't complain once when I had to ask him & his children to wash the dishes after dinner. He really appreciated that. No man wants a complaining, nagging wife. He is lucky.

4. I'm thoughtful. I'm frequently thinking of ways he can be a better husband (everyone can use some help sometimes. Well, most everyone, some of us don't need it.) & ways he can make my life easier. And, I'm always thinking up those cute little compliments he should be giving me. He loves that.

5. I'm pretty much perfect. In my head he told me how perfect I really am, but that seemed a little sacrilegious to me. I'm not that perfect - no one is - but I'm probably pretty close. He really does make a good argument for it. Like he said: I'm an excellent cook, I'm an awesome housekeeper, manager, organizer & decorator - watch out Martha, I'm on your heals. I still look good for my age - aka, hot momma. I sing, I dance, I'm way funny. Not to mention, I'm smart, witty & especially humble (the list could go on & on, but you get the point.)

Are you totally going, 'Oooooh! How sweet. She's so lucky!'? I am. I am so lucky that I'm a dreamer because that conversation, in my head, totally made my day. Does anyone ever say nice things to you in your head? Or do you have the best one-liners when no one else is listening? Let me know, I'd love to hear about your dreams & sweet escapes.

Tag, you're IT!

Okay, so yesterday I was telling my husband about how my days are going so much better since I've set the goal not to get on the computer during the daytime. They really have been better, I've been more productive, more patient with my kidlets, I have even provided dinner ev-er-y-day this week - not necessarily good ones, but something edible has been on the table.....before bedtime. (Except Sunday, which doesn't count because that's MY day of rest and so if people are bold enough to get hungry they can make it themselves - I don't care if you're 4 years old, it's time to learn some self-reliance.) He was so happy to hear my goal and I was totally pumped.

So anyways, about a 1/2 hour ago, I got off the phone with my girlfriend Becky, & I was telling her about this whole new, wonderful world of blogging and I got way nostalgic, totally missed my blog and then I wondered what was going on with each of you. So I decided that 4 days was a really good accomplishment and I'll try again next week. It's 3:00 right now and my two oldest chillens got home from school about 10 mins ago and I'm right here, right where I'm supposed to be, it feels like home - posting. (I have no idea where anyone else is, since the four of them saw me on the computer the house got eerily quiet.)

(*It's 7:00 now. I was only on for about 20 mins earlier when being the "responsible mother" got the better of me as my 2nd grader came in begging me to help him with his homework.......whatever. Some kids have no boundaries. And then I decided I probably should keep my daughter's Dr. appt. & since I was up I thought I might as well make dinner. But, I'm back)

What I'm getting at is that I was tagged, so really that makes breaking my goal the right thing to do. I've seen this happen a couple of times on a few of my friends blogs, before I ever had one, and I wondered what it was all about. I thought about what the rules of this game are: Who can you tag - anyone? What happens if you never respond to the tag, are you put on some kind of a blogging blacklist? And worse, what if you never get tagged? Are you like the kid who never gets picked for the team at recess? It really started to worry me. I wondered what I would do or say if I ever got tagged, but what would I do or say if I never got tagged? And then it happened, I was tagged last week and I'm finally responding, I believe I am still within my statute of limitations to reply.

My cute neice-in-law, tagged me about 6 quirks I have. I had to think long and hard about that one because I've never really thought of myself as a quirky person. 5 minutes later I came up with my list and then realized I had to narrow it down. Here's what I came up with:

1. Making goals that last 4 days & calling that an accomplishment.

2. I hate almost all condiments. Ketchup, mustard, mayo, salad dressing (except Italian), relish, anything along those lines - Blech! And no, it's not because I'm trying to be healthy or lose weight or anything admirable like that (I make up the calories I would have had in Symphony bars. Yeah, you know what I'm talking about). I'm just dang picky, I get it from my dad. Basically all I like, as far as that goes, is butter - not real butter, but the stuff that tastes really good - Country Crock, Salsa - yum, & Italian dressing.

3. I am terrible at recording on the camcorder. Manuel recently bought a new camera with a "special" button on it for "special" people like me who are 'recording challenged'. It's called an anti-shake button or something like that, and he "lovingly" continues to remind me to turn it on next time I record.

4. I am grossed out and weirdly drawn to freaky swarms of bugs. About this time each year we get these hornets nests on our shed and I know I should spray them as soon as I see them (I eventually get it done) because we have small children &it's not safe & blah..blah...blah...but I can't stop looking at them or taking pictures like these:

A couple of years ago we had this ginormous ant hill under our big pine trees, that I eventually had exterminated, which I'm still trying to get over, but the ants were so big and there were so many that you could hear them walking around on their hill when you were standing a couple of feet away. It was my kids science lesson all summer. Ewwww, huh?! I liked it.

5. I time everything on my stop watch. I love my watch. And I mean everything. Like, sacrament talks, testimonies, how long it takes me to write a post, how long it takes to gas up the car, exactly how long it takes me to drive from my house to my parents house in Utah, even how long it takes to go #1 on the potty. Have you ever timed that? 45 seconds really is a long time.

6. But I think my quirkiest thing is that I am obsessed with picking my husband's dry head. I am so lucky to have married a man with a super dry flaky scalp. I love it. It is my favorite pastime in the evenings after the kids are in bed. I could sit and pick his scalp all night if he would let me. This is pretty much what he thinks of it:

Okay, now I tag you: Sarah, Erin, Vanae, Mandy, Katie E., Katie U., Keri & Heather & really anyone who wants to respond to this tag because this is the all-inclusive team!

Was That A Compliment?

Well it finally happened. I thought I had another 10 years, at least, before I heard what I heard, but I guess my time's up. What was said? Well, it went something like this...."Oh my gosh, how many kids do you have?" (this coming from a skinny, totally hot, young 20-something mother of 1) I happily reply, "4 kids, the two youngest are twins." (I always add that last part because I feel like I have bragging rights to the fact that I had 2 at once inside of me, sqeezed them both out and lived to tell about it.) Here comes the whole reason for this post, her response: "Wow, I hope I look like you when I'm your age and have had a few more kids."

I didn't know how to react. Was that a compliment? How old does she think I am? At that moment it hit me, I have said that a few times myself, always meant well, but it is not a compliment. Oh no! I would just like to take a moment to apologize to all of the hotty, old ladies I have ever said that too - I'm sorry, I understand now. I didn't realize my age was so obvious to other people! I was hoping that no one else had noticed the steady increase of cushioning to my back seat. I kept trying to tell myself that those crows feet are not really on my face they're only in my head. And I was sure that my gray hair really only shows up in my bathroom lighting at 11:00 P.M. I guess I'm wrong.

I'm not sure I'm ready for this - to be put in that "you look good for your age" category. It just means you're not as young & skinny as you used to be. I was sure that when I walked down the halls at the high school, (after dropping my kids off at the preschool that the child development class runs), that I fit right in and looked like one of the students. I suppose those boys weren't checking me out, they were probably wondering whose mom I was. And now I bet the girls were saying to themselves, "Oh my gosh, I hope I look like that when I'm as OLD as her." I was sure that the young 20-somethings thought I was one of them and that I must have had London when I was like 11. Oh well. Ready or not, here I am. I'm 33 and proud of it. I may not look as young as I used to, and I may not be as in shape as I once was, but I'm not totally giving up.....yet. Until then I'll just keep trying to "look good for my age"!